Confessions of a Shopaholic

Okay, so maybe the title of this post is a slight exaggeration. I wouldn’t quite call myself a shopaholic – discontent is more like it. How embarrassing considering I have so much to be thankful for.

For me, the trouble comes in when I’m feeling a little blah about life – a pretty dress will cheer me up! When I’m feeling self conscious about pursuing my photography dreams – I need a new lens/ flash/whatever else I’ve convinced myself I ‘need’! When I wake up in the morning and stare into my overflowing wardrobe and can find nothing to wear – nothing a Woolies haul can’t solve!

I am relying on things to make me happy and I’m so focused on making things look pretty on the outside that I’m completely neglecting the inside. I have fallen into the consumerism trap of believing that it’s my ‘stuff’ gives me worth.

Confessions of a shopaholic

 

Not too long ago, I came across a contentment challenge and determined to escape my materialistic ways, I, too, embarked on a shopping ban – at the beginning of Autumn, might I add, right when I am tempted to shop for a new season!

I have challenged myself  to cut all spending on unnecessaries like clothes, accessories, decor items, and books (I am a bookaholic with a shelf full of books I have yet to read) for three months. Eeeek!

Well, today marks just over 5 weeks of this journey and it’s been harder than I’d like to admit, especially when visiting fabulous markets and with online shopping being so easy. Yesterday I had a book in my Takealot shopping cart for over an hour before I moved it to my wishlist instead. That was hard.

Search for contentment - Confessions of a Shopaholic

 

I don’t want that to be who I am. I don’t want ‘stuff’ to define me. I don’t want ‘stuff’ to be where I find my happiness because it will be short-lived. I don’t want to live in the shallow waters, I want to experience the depths of this life, and I firmly believe that all this stuff we keep collecting gets in the way of that. Contentment is the goal, so I’m determined to be different, and by living small, I’ll in fact be living big.

“I don’t want that to be who I am. I don’t want ‘stuff’ to define me. I don’t want ‘stuff’ to be where I find my happiness because it will be short-lived.”

So you might be wondering how a ‘shopping sabbatical’, as I like to call it, works? What about groceries and toiletries? Let me explain my ‘rules’.

Shopping Sabbatical Guidelines:

  1. No new clothes – unless it’s something I am replacing. So if my stockings have a hole in them, I’m allowed to get a new pair. But that’s it.
  2. Necessaries are allowed – so of course I’m going to grocery shop and stock up on toiletries – but nothing extra. So a new nail polish, or a new eyeshadow shade that I absolutely do not need is not allowed.
  3. Ban on home stuff – A tough one for me, but I have given up on buying home decor and kitchen accessories*.
    *I’m going to be honest and say we did buy a gorgeous mirror for our new home at the Tierlantyn’kies Kuier en Koopfees but it was a decision Steven and I made because: it was such a huge discount, it was something we’ve been looking for, and it was the exact right colour as well! There has to be a consequence, right? So I’ll add an extra few days onto my challenge and promise to not break my sabbatical again.
  4. No books – It’s like my go-to when I’m needing a bit of inspiration – I find a good book to buy. Well, I’m not reading as often as I’d like and I really should be making my way through the stack of books I already have waiting for me.
  5. Gifts are okay – don’t worry, if you’re a loved one and your birthday is in the next few months, you’ll still get a present. The trouble only comes in when I’m tempted to buy myself the same thing as well.

I must admit, I’m feeling rather vulnerable sharing this about myself. I find it incredibly embarrassing to admit my lack of contentment and how I rely on ‘stuff’ for a spike of ‘happiness’.

So why am I sharing this with you? I must admit, it feels good to get it off my chest and share with you, in love, a problem I know so many of us face. I’m sharing this incredibly personal post to let you know that this is a real thing, something to be faced, and most of all, for accountability. If I’ve posted it on my blog, I’m less likely to falter on this journey to find contentment. And perhaps you’ll join me on my crusade for less – after all, there is beauty in simplicity.

P.S. See my next post on how I’ve been finding contentment during this sabbatical.crazy beautiful blog

 

 

 

 

 

Jenna-Leigh de Wit

Blogger and Social Media Strategist. In ♡ with the idea of inspiring with words & photographs.

7 Comments
  1. I have been in your shoes!!!! I realised I had a problem when my credit card was higher than I’d like (ie it wasn’t at zero!). So I went to a Money School (http://www.abundancebydesign.co.za/money-school/) to try and reset my thinking. And it did the WORLD of good! I successfully paid off my credit within 3 months and have managed to keep the balance of my card at an absolute minimum (surprise expenses have had to put on there but no unnecessary purchases have been made what so ever).

    Its been a few months now that I don’t even miss the feeling of “new stuff”. I can successfully leave a shopping centre empty handed now if I can’t find or afford what I went in there looking for. I finally feel empowered. I feel like money and stuff no longer has a hold on me. And man the savings I have managed to make mean an overseas trip is finally in my future!! I’d much rather put my spare money towards that than a new top/book/bag that I really don’t need.

    I hope the sabbatical will help you find your inner happiness and help you release the desire to constantly want to shop.

    1. Thank you so much for your comment, Kate! I knew I wasn’t the only one on this journey and I’m so glad you shared your experience! One thing I can say for sure is that I love feeling of being in control instead of being controlled! I had to visit the shops on the weekend to print a photo for a gift and I proudly walked past my favourite stores without feeling a tug.

      What could be more of an incentive than an overseas trip or anything else worth really saving for! I hope you have an amazing time!

      Thank you, I do believe it will. I feel like now that it’s something I am aware of, I can change my thoughts much easier. Here’s to becoming a more content, ‘stuff-free’ person!

  2. I love this post so much! Not because you are having a bit of a difficult time but because I have been there, in fact, I am still there. I know exactly how you are feeling and its a crap one but well done for taking the steps to try and improve it. I literally feel like you took the words out of my mouth with this one… Also, fellow bookworm 🙂
    Good luck for the rest of your shopping sabbatical, I want to follow your journey with you and I may even do it myself. X

    1. Thanks, Kerry! It really is liberating admitting this issue and doing something about it! I’m glad I was able to verbalise what you’ve been feeling as well. It’s encouraging to know I’m not alone in this. I’ll definitely be doing follow up posts – I have already learnt so much in these last 5 weeks! xx

  3. I can relate 100%, thank you for sharing. Was actually browsing the online shops today because it’s payday and managed to stop myself before buying anything. It made me think of that movie “Confessions of a Shopaholic” and I was tempted to watch it tonight :p Like KateF my credit card is also higher than I’d like and I’m getting it under control slowly, but I’ve decided to join you on your shopping sabbatical. What a brilliant idea that is! I have no doubt it will be challenging but I am going overseas in December so need to put some money away. Will check back in after 3 months and let you know how it’s gone!

    1. I’m so glad, Sian! I know, online shopping is definitely my weakness. It’s just far too easy!

      Yay, I’m so glad you’re joining me! It will be so worth it once you’re enjoying an overseas adventure with some extra spending money – far better to spend on experiences vs. stuff!

      Best of luck, and let me know how it goes!

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